I want to have your abortion
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Randomize
