After last night, I could never be a politician.
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
you told all the 17 year old girls at the party that your mating call was "I glitter in the sun"
i just fucked the bartender on my cruise to get free alcohol. have things gone too far?
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I heard an explosion in the backyard. You told me you were playing "will it burn".
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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