chick flicks and taylor swift songs are like porn for desperate singles
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
Do you know any thirteen year old jewish kids? I'm looking for a party.
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Randomize
