it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Just passed a guy passed out on a riding lawn mower in his front yard.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I don't know what you slipped me, but my TV is vomming blood right now. Thanks, jerkoff.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
