I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
Judging by his bulge. This guy is going home with me. Who doesn't want a dick that looks like it used to be a pillar in Rome.
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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