are you so shy because you have an std?
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Awkward family moment #1: walked in on my 15 yr old nephew packing a bowl. Nephew says- "lets not ruin christmas and keep this our little secret"
You have to summon your inner elephant
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I had a dream that we had an entire sofa made out of cocaine.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
just showered sitting down cuz standing seemed like too much work, thursdays need to stop making me their bitch.
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
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