"it" just moved
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
When we do our power hour over Skype I'm just going to sit on the toilet so that way I won't have to get up in the middle of it and miss any shots
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
I made a bet with her that she would show me her tits if I finished my beer. Only on spring break.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
