Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
He makes me wish my vagina was bigger... This must be what love feels like.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I'm helping my Mormon ex boyfriend from high school embrace his inner cross dresser. This is truly god's work.
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
