Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I just had to beg some random guy to help me climb through your porch window since the door was locked. FYI...i hear you having sex in there. You could of at least taken a break to unlock the damn door. WTF!!!
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
