well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
She's going to get preggers, drop out of school, and end up working at mcdonalds. Great for our mcdoubles habit but bad for her future.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
I'm currently being signed up to be painted nude for a college art class. ah yes best high decision ever
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
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