Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
I went golfing for the first time today!! Aren't you proud?
Driving a golf cart around all day with a keg attatched to the back doesn't exactly count as golfing
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
We left your bucket of puke on your doorstep to clean out yourself. You're welcome.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Just found a handle of Tito's in my TV stand
Can't recall when I put that there, but let's goooo
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