I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Its midnight, he's burning water on the stove and keeps yelling at me and telling me not to burn myself.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Randomize