I murdered the dance floor call the cops
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
COVER ME IN BACON THATS MY FETISH
ACTUALLY ITS NOT, I HAVE NO FUCKING IDEA WHAT AWAKENS THE MONSTER BELOW THE BELT
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
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