I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
I never thought that I'd hear someone utter the words, "I need another studded belt." I was wrong.
Is it because I queefed?
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
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