ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Sober me admires drunk me's enthusiasm, but there is no way I'm going to make it out there today.
Lol drunk you is so full ideas and happy. Sober you is full of grumpy reality.
I'm drinking coffee out of a pasta sauce jar and eating fruit soaked in Smirnoff. I think I've hit rock bottom.
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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