before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Just say the word and u can be elbow deep in this glorious rack
This is why I love you...
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
so at target i bought condoms, on sale undies, pasta roni, and martini mix. the old lady who rang me up asked "honey are you a freshman?" yea lady i am, thanks.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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