I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
