I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
Randomize
