If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
You need Jesus like Tony Danza needs another hit show.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
FIND ME A DICK TO RIDE THAT HOPEFULLY IS ATTACHED TO A CUTE PERSON AND NICE PERSONALITY
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED. Is it okay if I only get 2 out of 3?
The D is nonnegotable.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
taking shots alone in my kitchen before I go learn to give a lapdance. when did this become my life?
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