I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
