When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
you'd be alarmed at how much plan b i just found in mom's bathroom...
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
I am seriously considering thanking Macallan 18 in my thesis acknowledgments.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Welp... sober this am and I still have a parrot.
I figured you were on something. You're way too happy right now to be sober
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
I just realized that this is the first time I've ever seen your mom without sucking your cock.
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
Randomize
