fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Throw up on the ground, people dancing to loud Bollywood music, seats literally missing. Fuck I hate public transit
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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