you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
At some point tonight the bad ideas in my head became bad decisions that happened outside my head
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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