problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
I met her tumbling down the stairs chugging Captain Morgan. I'm not sure why she has the better reputation either.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
This cabbie knows where I live. Both awesome and weird.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
I just gave a fucking twenty minute blowiob.. I'm a GOOD girlfriend.
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