Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Some are given great drunkenness. Others have great drunkenness thrust upon them, in the form of ice storms.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I touched the butt once. 'Twas an experience with the greatness of legend. So I touched it once more.
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
He just showed up at my house with a giant box of Trojans and a 6-pack of Yoohoo "for a special treat afterwards". I'm in love.
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
