some girl in front of me in class just googled "hungover+throwing up blood"
Dude just fell down the stars trying to leave class early, the prof just looks down at him and says"thats what you get"
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
Randomize