Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
You were in your third change of clothes, and I found you in my driveway passed out with my dog's food bowl. You win.
Third base with a 7ft basketball player last night. Fingers like a champ. I call him Edward Penishands.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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