You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
Randomize
