Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
Only at my house do scrabble games turn into fist fights. I won though... the fight not the board game.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
Vodka, MiraLAX and Gatorade are perfect for the night before a colonoscopy
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
Randomize
