i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Yes, you did come over last night. You also tried to give my dog a blowjob. You got rejected.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Honestly I miss having a gay roommate. His female friends' implicit trust in him would carry over to me even though they knew Im straight. Best unintentional wingman ever.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
Randomize
