The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
way to not show up for Habitat for Humanity, real classy...
I saved lives by not driving this morning
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
He wears a hat. All the time. Even during sex. And I'm okay with that.
NEW RULE: NO INNAPROPRIATE CHOICES THAT INVOLVE GUNS. I LIKE IT. WRITE THAT DOWN.
my mom went out and bought me new sheets and redecorated my room. its like she's more excited for me to get laid tomorrow for the first time in two months than I am.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
Why did I just find out you and Andrew had sex right next to my face when I passed out on the beach?
At the time it seemed romantic and its also extremely frowned down upon to leave a passed out person by themselves in an unfamiliar place.
Why did I wake up by myself then?
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
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