Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Ok: all ex-gfs except you from the last 5 years have or are about to have a baby...be on the lookout...
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
