Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
is it wrong that i woudl like to tie u down to the baby changing station using the straps provided?
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
boobs and vodka. thats all i can remember, finals week needs to stop ending like this..
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
we watched a porno and made a drinking game out of it. best first date ever.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Wait wait wait. You are actually taking advice from this lunatic?
This is the girl who got a balloon full of cocaine through security no questions asked. Of course I'm taking her advice.
Valid.
Randomize
