I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
we tried have sex after i gave him a handjob. he wouldnt get hard and kept saying his little boy is broken.. please come get me
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
we just bought Vicodin from the Chinese delivery guy, this day just keeps getting better.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
We started a fund for a baby in a wine glass, I think we're pretty responsible.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
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