Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
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