We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
She went off on a twilight/new moon tangent before we even got back to my room. i had to jump the ship and pretended to pass out on the sidewalk.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
He showed up with a hearse full of beer and is currently shooting pumpkins with a flare gun. Who gives a shit if he's a furry. We need to party with him more often.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
