Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
hey can you give me head? jesse told me that you're really good
who is this?
jesse's little brother
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
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