We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
i just stole a 8 pack of olde english 40s and 2 roles of duct tape. we are going to make edward proud tonight.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Dude. Stop sending me lines from Hungry Like the Wolf
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I need two food groups: booze and turkey sandwiches
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
