I actually just cleaned easy glide lube off my desk. My life has gone way down hill since I met you.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
Randomize
