soooo.. i guess the cop said he'd drop the charges if i go to some AA meetings and i said fuck AA. not one of my better choices.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
He could only go see Deadpool without his girl if he was black-out drunk... because spoilers. They're the perfect couple.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
Randomize
