oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
My cab driver has a hooker in the front seat. Really, this is serious. And weird.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
So the next three days will be henceforth known as the 'celebration of the end of the most irresponsible years of my life' be prepared to wake up naked in a ditch.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
I jumped the fence at the bar last night. My dress got stuck and I ended up flashing the entire patio for a good 30 seconds.
At the 10 second mark everyone started to whistle and cheer. Free drinks all night
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
