I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
