You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
idk about you, but when i sext i just hit em with the "yo lets bang" text
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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