Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
What am I doing with my life
Sleeping with dudes who have peacocks apparently.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
This is getting exciting. I almost wanna turn off all the lights, get some popcorn, and stare at my phone screen to see if she's going to say yes or not
And on a much sadder note, I'm way to drunk for this right now
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
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