our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
Why are there chunks of your hair in everyones pocket?
I decided to mark my territory.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I like the wholesome side of you
I'm so goddamned horny I could use all my pent up energy to tear a redwood out by its roots.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Oh. So it is a cult
Basically. But a nice cult. They eat muffins and talk about fundraising.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
If I had any lingering questions about my sexuality, the strip club tonight verified I'm 100% gay
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
The school better be open next year. I’ve been FB stalking Dads of my incoming students and there’s serious DILFage in this class! Maybe 2020 will turn around!
It’s 2020. You’ll probably get knocked up. If you’re really lucky you’ll just get the clap
Randomize
