were not allowed back there because i puked on the waitresses foot while trying to order another round. for myself.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I'm two sheets to the sexual wind
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
