her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
i now understand why vodka
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
