im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
