i felt like cinderella. except at midnight i turned back into a whore.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Stop making all the ice cubes only big enough to fit in your bong. It takes like 3 trays for a glass of ice water
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
You know what it feels like? It feels like I'm in that prison from the dark knight rises. That's what being a virgin in college feels like.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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