you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
Doing laundry, just found a knob off your stove in my pants pocket. I don't know.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
I'm reading the Hobbit in my blanket fort alone with a bottle of wine... all I need is dungeons and dragons to complete this superfecta of awesome
Randomize
