Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
A guy claiming to be the Japanese counterpart to the White Power Ranger is trying to take me home....
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
we decided to take the jello everclear shot at the party...didnt think it tasted any different....o dear god...the regret..
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
Randomize