guess who came home with a hottie last night
Def drugged
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Sometimes I forget to take my socks off when I masturbate. This always makes me feel like I'm accidentally in a porn.
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Not going to lie, when I looked in the tub I expected to see what might have been remnants of a squirrel.
Randomize
