Jon and Kate. Drink everytime we see tears. Drink twice if a child cries. Finish your bev if you cry.
i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
I'm eating Swedish fish out of my boobs and watching SOA.. There is no way your Tuesday night will be better than mine.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
just used my $120 dollar stats book for the first time to kill an ant... good thing i stole it
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